Sunday, May 2, 2010

ROBBLOG The W E E K E N D Edition

Why does so much of the “history” and documentation of Christianity- the Bible in particular, have to be populated with half-truths?
I wanted to say “lies”, but decided that was too harsh.
Um, simply made up?
Not much better. It’ll have to do.
The Christian religion, home to bloodletting and the reason for much of the world’s conflicts- past and present. I know the Christian flock follow Jesus because of something called “faith”. I suppose all religions are based on some form of faith. It’s why they are referred to as religions.
Nothing much seems to be based on hard fact. In a nutshell, there’s a book- supposedly God’s words, that came from on high. That’s up where God and the Angels live.
My Dad lives there too.
These words were eventually scribed by mortal man. A group of guys who centuries ago, sat around this big table and perused the writings of the Disciples and other “prophets” and spliced them all together to make a book. This book- a bestseller by any standards, is about “men” mostly- not about “women”- unless the women in the stories are pouring a carafe of wine, working in the kitchen or grieving. The book is black and white to many- not grey and white. The Bible could be a book of fiction. To get past the term “fiction” one has to have “faith”.
I get that.

Now, along comes a Christian group called Noah’s Ark Ministries International. That’s Nami for short. I figured that out all by myself.

This evangelical group of explorers- Nami, claimed- a few days ago, to have found the remains of Noah’s Ark in a bunch of caves way up Mount Ararat. This is the place- where legend has it, that the Ark hit ground after 40 days and nights of rain. Noah and his family- and the animals too, stepped right up to the task at hand after the rain stopped and re-populated the earth. Of course if this were a huge end-of-the-world spectacular from Hollywood, Canada would not have been mentioned so, I take it if you lived in Canada during Biblical times, you would have stayed high and dry.
I digress.

Video of these guys- the Nami, pointing and smiling while looking at old logs seemed rather convincing- at first. Upon further inspection and with the babbling of a rat in the midst of the Nami pack, the joy that was the discovery of the ark seems to have turned into a story of untruths.

Sidebar: Who knew there were so many words for the word “lie”?

Apparently, a bunch of guys pulled a bunch of old logs from the seaside all the way up Mount Ararat. They kind of hid them and then announced that they found Noah’s Ark.
God must be fuming.
Another distortion of the truth. Tsk. Tsk. I was going to use the word “lie” here again but I don’t want to piss of the Baptists- although that can be fun, especially when a Gay guy- or as the Baptists love to say “Homosexual”, tells them that all is not right with the Biblical World and word. Nonetheless, even though a tattle-tale is in their midst, Nami is trying to get the caves designated as a UNESCO World Heritage Site- like Stephen Harper’s fibbing lips.

I know what you’re thinking. I was on a roll so I thought I would take a stab at the Harperites while I had the Christians on a spit. Now it appears Noah’s huge boat is simply a bunch or un-related sticks and completely worthless. No money to be made here it seems.

File this story alongside the story of the guy who sell bits of the wooden cross Christ was nailed to in a lovely glass pendant. Great for birthdays, Christmas or any other gift-giving occasion.

Have a good day and don’t believe what you see and hear- like the contents of this blog for instance.