Friday, November 12, 2010

ROB BLOG # 179 W E E K E N D Edition

It’s pretty hard to ignore the fact that the Holidays are coming.

For the past two weeks the advertisements accompanying Thursday’s papers are totally
“Go Christmas”! There’s a plethora of various flyers. When stacked together they are as thick as a single volume of the Canadiana Encyclopaedia.
The what?
For the youngsters in the audience, once upon a time we got our information from something called an “encyclopaedia”. It was a book stuffed with facts- in alphabetical order, about this world in which we live.
Since our world was continually evolving back in the “old days”, it was usually out-of-date the day it was published. Ah the quiet, simple time before computers, cell phones and googling.

I always take time to browse through the goods being offered me, although many flyers don’t even get a second look- like Sears, Leon’s, Bad Boy and most of the food store ads. I always browse through the Mark’s Work Wearhouse ads however, if only to “oogle” the male models. Just where do they get these incredible big, beefy, handsome men that model everything from underwear to socks, robes and tee shirts?
Can I be on the committee that interviews the models that eventually wear the products featured and why don’t these various models tour the Mark’s stores to meet shoppers such as myself?
They need a Gay man to arrange that for them- don’t you think?

I was reading yesterday that many clothing stores are going “back to the beef”- not that Mark’s ever left. Apparently, the days of “twinks” modelling fashions are numbered. The more muscular, hirsute male is making a return. That’s right, males that look like they would actually wear flannel shirts or tighty-whities are now appearing in magazines and on runways.

“Twinks” you say?
A term used in the Gay World for young men with 28 inch waists, barely a bit of stubble on their chins and nary a follicle of hair on their pasty white bodies. The type of guy an Italian Momma would love to fatten up.

“Eat. Eat! How you gonna grow up big and astronguh and putta the hair on your chest ifa you donna eat?”

Fortunately it’s a natural for most Italian men to sport chestfulls of curly, black hair. Maybe Momma’s pastas really work!

Back to the flyers…
Over a cup of tea, I browse through the colourful pages of electronics, clothes and Christmas décor. Usually, I find something at a good price. For instance, this year I am debating how to decorate Christmas trees with two five month old kittens in residence. I have been thinking “shatterproof” ornaments and not glass balls. I have a lot of vintage ornaments that are made from blown glass but these would also catch the mischievous eyes of little kitties.
A box of 100 shatterproof ornaments would set me back 20 dollars at Zellers- the formerly “proud to be Canadian” retailer.
That’s right. Zellers as well as The Bay, is as Canadian as Wal*Mart these days.
So, I’ll save the glass ornaments for another year when the puddy-tats are more mature.

Although outdoors it feels more like September or early October, the flyers tell us to shop now- else we’ll be disappointed later. Translated that means that if you shop after November’s Santa Claus Parade, things will be “picked over”!

Have a good one!