Monday, March 19, 2012


Assholes are giving “idiots” a bad name.

C’mon people.
Being an idiot is a pretty high position to hold. Why try to better it by one? Remember a week ago that gentlemen who waltzed onto Lake Simcoe- after OPP warnings to stay off because the ice was unsafe- told a local paper- “Look, I’m not an idiot!” when we all knew he was. In fact he was the only living idiot who didn’t know he was one. He said that because he was vying for position of “top” idiot.
The race is on every March.
I didn’t hear about any of the other idiots vying for the honour, although I am sure at least one of them said-
“Hell, there’s at least 4 inches of ice out there!”

I know ice fishermen say this because my Dad was an ice fisherman and he said that all the time until one day he fell through the ice and had to be pulled to safety by a friend. He still said the same thing years later however.
He never learned his lesson.
So, it seems to be passed down to generations of ice fishermen.
As my Dad an “asshole”.
There are some that would answer yes to that question.

Look, when I head out on the ice in January after 4 weeks of sub-zero temps and I am but a hundred metres from the safety of shore, I still think about plummeting through the frozen surface to my death and becoming a tasty snack for the perch and the huge fish with razor sharp teeth that live in Lake Couchiching’s murky depths. Nobody will call me an idiot in that regard!

So what have we learned here?
Yes, some idiots turn into “assholes” and those are the same “assholes” that give idiots a bad name.

Take the College idiots (read: “assholes”)  who threw beer cans, trashed and set police cars ablaze and then threw a propane tank of top of the flames. The mayhem continued as they turned a CTV News Cruiser into a torch and then lit some trees on fire. This all happened during a drunken St. Paddy’s Party that was apparently out of hand at four in the afternoon. It just evolved into an all-out “asshole” fest by midnight and into the wee small hours of the morning.
Yes. Even to get to be an “asshole” one must evolve.
It’s a downward spiral of course but evolution all the same.

A riddle-
How many assholes does it take to be arrested after acting like a bunch of Syrians?


Eleven “assholes” were arrested.
I say, throw the “assholes” in jail for 11 years. They’ll all be able to write life stories of being an “asshole” when they get out of prison and make a million “asshole” dollars!
I’ll bet those assholes’ assholes will be sore once “Bubba” and “Big Bruce” get a hold of them!

There has to be an “asshole” of a lesson there.
I wonder if any of them can figure it out?

Naw. Only an idiot could!