Sunday, August 11, 2013


It’s been a week now since Kiki- our beautiful 17 year old lab, passed.
It’s been a tough time.
Many tears.
Many memories.
Telling the story of her life and her passing many, many times over.
The hole in our hearts is still there. We know it will fill up one day soon but until then, we still grieve. We have a small memorial set up for her on one of our mantles. Pictures of Kiki with her Dads. Flowers, cards, mementos- even a sketch from a neighbour’s daughter- a bright yellow rendering of Kiki smiling broadly.
A bright yellow stone with a butterfly in the centre- which we have dubbed “The Kiki Stone”, lies embedded in the grass in a favourite spot where she laid to keep watch over her yard. The stone comes from good friends who loved her too. The week before she passed we took her for a final romp at “We’re in the Hayfield Now”- a lily farm owned by friends. We purchased a lily called “Lemon-Lime”. We since have renamed the yellow beauty- Miss Kiki.
Everyone seemed to know and love our girl. 17 years is a vast amount of time in puppy years to come in contact with many, many people.
I look at old photos.
I stare deep into her beautiful brown eyes.
Today, she holds a prominent spot on our computer screen- the wallpaper.
I stroke her head every night.
Silly, I know- but I can almost feel her warmth.
In our hearts we believe she is frolicking in the green grass of another place- not far from here, accompanied by the family that passed on before her.
She’s young again with no pain or discomfort.
She’s waiting for her Dads.
I told her we’d be along- soon.
That will be a wonderful day. We have to believe what we believe and I believe so terribly deeply that we’ll see our Kiki Girl again one day.
Missy our mini-schnauzer is in a funk. The past few days her eyes are filled with sadness-unusual for a schnauzer. Oh there are bright spots when her eyes sparkle and she barks with happiness. Those times over this past week are the times when we took a van ride or a had walk around the block. She clings and snoozes on the pillow where Kiki last laid. Dickens and Doyle- our orange tabbies, look for Kiki too. A glance at bedtime to the bottom of the bed says it all. Doyle would lay next to Kiki, his head on the nape of her yellow neck
…and they call them dumb animals.
Kiki left us with much. She taught us many things.
Things like-
Letting go…
She taught us to do the right thing.
To be sad and yet to remember.
We know the sadness will pass.
We have wonderful memories.
We’ll think of the hugs and the Kiki kisses.
Her loving Dad Tom, taking her out each evening just before bed. Patiently waiting on the verandah bench for her to have a sniff around the yard and finish her business. In recent weeks there were times he had to carry her up the steps. You could see the love on her face.
What a good Dad.
I’ll remember the songs I sang to her.
Each evening at bedtime, I sang:
You are my sunshine,
My only sunshine,
You make me happy-
When skies are grey…
Then, the ditty I always sang to her at any time of the day. I sang it to her a week ago for the last time…
I love you Miss Kiki-
Miss Kiki I love you.
I love you Miss Kiki-
I honestly do.
Now I have added this verse.
I miss you Miss Kiki,
Miss Kiki I miss you.
I miss you Miss Kiki-
I honestly do…