Wednesday, September 15, 2010


Did you hear that Hank is running for Mayor?

Only he says “Hank four Mayor”.
He tells me he has only “four” proposals for his campaign and hence the “four Mayor” bit.
He phoned me yesterday. I thought he wanted another script revision for “A Chatty HANKmuss” that plays the Stubley auditorium for four performances on December 11 and 12th.

“No Shur, the schript is jusht fine”- he tells me on the phone. “I jusht want to tell you shat I am running for Mayor.”

“What?” I couldn’t believe my ears.

“Shure. Itsh going to be shuch fun.” He says with excitement in his voice.

“Well good luck with that.”

“Gheesh Rob, I don’t need any more luck. I got luck coming out of my ash shum daysh.”

“I’ll say you have.”

He hangs up.

Hank sent me an e-mail as a follow up to our telephone conversation. He’s got quite a team assembled- including Lottie who is his campaign manager/press secretary. Lottie pulled me aside yesterday, upon seeing me at lunchtime over at Angelo’s “Picnic Restaurant” on Memorial Avenue-

“Oh Gosh yes, Hank’s got it all sewed up pretty well. He’s a definite possibility for a “write in mayoral candidate”. Lottie is excited. Her eyes are sparkling through lenses encased in multi-coloured frames.

“I thought the nomination process was closed a couple of days ago.”- I questioned.

“Oh Hell’s Bells. A day late- a dollar short!”

I stated that of course, knowing that one should never consider stating a fact with Lottie-
or any question wherein you’re not prepared for a surprising answer! One should always let Lottie lead the conversation. Believe me. It’s easier- and infinitely safer!

“Won’t that be difficult? Not being a “legal entity”? I mean- as far as being a candidate for mayor is concerned?”- I added quickly.

Lottie chimed right in- “Oh Land’s Sakes, no. It’s a free country last time I looked. Well ‘cept for what that Harper fella’s trying to do up there by Ottawa. No, that Hank’s got a good head on his shoulders, that’s for sure. He know’s which side the butter is on. Even my husband Lars understands where he’s coming from.”

“Well good luck to him. Seems to me like he’s cramming a lot in this fall, what with his Christmas Show in rehearsal and now his running for Mayor.”

“Now you listen here!”- She points a rigid finger in my face. “That boy Hank can run rings ‘round every last one of them at City Hall. Heck you could light the rings on fire and he would still run round ‘em!”


“Now that’s a deep subject!”

She spins on the heels of her rubber boots, her Mariposa Market bag swinging this way and that at her side. She’s gone in a flash!

“See ya later sunshine!” A backwards wave of her hand and she’s out the door to her pickup.