Wednesday, July 13, 2011


The shit should be hitting Toronto Mayor Rob Ford's fan anytime now.

After the big, bulbous, buffoon totally ignored the Toronto Pride Celebrations- even though the flag- raising was right in City Hall's front yard, Ford has now thrown his support behind- and it's a big one, what used to be Caribanna. Caribanna has be re-named. It's called something else. Something about a Caribbean Celebration etc. The name's too long and too cumbersome to commit to memory.

Now, if good old Mr. Ford was embarrassed about seeing exposed skin at Pride, he sure is lapping it up at The Toronto Caribbean Fest. A picture shows a smiling Mayor doing what appears to be either the “chicken dance” or the “Twist” with a scantily clad young woman doffed in feathers. Looks a lot like the Pride Parade to me, only the scantily clad young woman could be a scantily clad young man- in Drag.
God, I hope she isn't Lesbian at least!!
Not that there is anything wrong with that...

What does this prove?
It proves something that we all knew all along- if you read between the lines of any newspaper article prior to Pride Week- Rob Ford is Homophobic.
Not just a little.
A lot.
One, two, step, three four dip!
Look, he hid for an entire weekend behind his mother's apron's strings up at the family cottage in Muskoka. He had another councillor read a proclamation- with his name on it, at the Rainbow Flag raising at Nathan Phillips Square. He didn't have the “guts” as mayor to show up to that or any other “public” Pride event.
He is the Mayor of all Torontonians- even those that didn't vote for him. Just like Harper sitting on his throne in Ottawa. He needs to be constantly reminded that just 40% of voters actually wanted him for their PM. By the way- did you see that picture of Stephen in a headdress and warpaint as he was made honourary member of a Southern Alberta First Nations tribe.
Good Lord people!
He's a Conservative! In reality, wouldn't he just as soon put his Tory wagons in a circle and fend you off-not dab some “poster paint” on his pale face- adorned with eyewear no less.
Ya have to laugh- don't you?

Back to Ford.
He could have said at a press conference-
Look, I'm just a little unsure about this Gay thing. It makes me uncomfortable. Give me some time and I'll work on being less comfortable. I am not homophobe, it's just outside my comfort zone right now.”
Wouldn't that have been better than hiding away in a Muskoka bush?

When I first came “out”, I was less than comfortable in the Gay community- especially bars. They were nothing more than “meat markets” in the 80's. One had to “learn the ropes” before feeling comfortable but once that comfort zone was reached those bars were the safest place a Fag could be in Toronto. Now walking to and from these bars- many were down dark alleys, that was another kettle of Gay Fish entirely!

Funny, there hasn't been a newspaper article on Ford- post parade, that I've read. The whole thing was dropped like a lead jockstrap. Now, really, I shouldn't be that hard on Toronto's Portly Pie after all, isn't name-calling infantile?
Isn't it?

I don't have to look too far around my life here in Orillia to know that there's a certain level of “dis-comfort”. For example, nobody attended Toronto Pride Celebrations with my husband Tom and I. Everyone seemed busy all of a sudden.
Friends and family didn't call in the week or so leading up to the event.
When I asked my Mother why I hadn't heard from her she said-

Oh I thought it was your celebration and you'd be busy?”

Celebration? Busy?”- I asked.

Yes you know “your” parade and all.”

Oh.”- I was a bit taken aback.

Mum, that is a Toronto celebration- not here in Orillia, although Tom and I hope to go to the Pride Parade”.

We did of course and had a wonderful time.
There were a bevy of excuses.
I'm not going to list them but it might have been nice to get a call or two asking if we were going and- “could we tag along?”

We wouldn't make anyone do something or go somewhere they didn't want to go.
We'd even tell then to divert their eyes if one of the “old-timers” of the Toronto TNT sauntered by with his “family jewels” sagging to his knees. Or if a “Chick with a Dick” and heels- nothing more walked proudly past. Anyway, there were too many straight folks crowding around taking photos of “chicks” and naked old guys, that one could barely see what was happening even if one wanted to. Gay couples just rolled their eyes and passed by quickly- smiling all the while.
Look, We don't particularly care for that either.

So here's Robbie-Bobby getting down and dirty with a “Caribanna Babe” and shouts to the crowd concerning his attendance- “I'll be there!”
Good for you Robert.
A festival for blacks gyrating, jumping and grinding their way along the Lakeshore or through the Ex grounds- practically naked.
That is within the confines of the Mayor's idea of decency and sexual conservatism.
I have no problem with Caribanna- just Fordy-pordy.

A final comment.
I don't remember anyone getting shot at a Pride Parade with over a million attendees. Maybe a Gay man or two getting “bashed” as they headed home from a day of Gay abandon but I don't think anyone has ever taken “pot shots” into the crowd watching the Pride Parade pass by.

Can't say the same about “The Caribbean Celebration.” As a matter of fact the party-people had to be confined behind a tall metal fence several years ago and herded into a particular area- for crowd control, unlike Toronto Pride where marchers galore happily trott across Bloor and down Yonge Street with just waist high barriers along the parade route.

I'm just saying...