Tuesday, August 17, 2010


Have you ever been a CEO of a company- Chief Executive Officer?

I guess I am a CEO at Swisssh the Website as well as Swisssh Radio- only because there are no other employees around the massive Swisssh Radio Complex, located high above the Orillia skyline.

Yes Sir. I am the chief cook and bottle washer- although there aren’t usually that many bottles to be washed around Swisssh, since we are a communications company- not a brewery. Holding the “CCABW” position isn’t a bad thing, it’s just that’s there’s no room for advancement.

Now being a real CEO, of a “real” company is something that is being run up the flagpole in front of me these days, like a freshly pulled garden carrot dangled in front of a cute little rabbit.
Hard to resist but there’s always a price- isn’t there?
Farmer McGregor in the case of the rabbit and money in the case of a wannabe CEO.
There’s more to come on that topic, once a resolution is reached.
Please do not adjust your Blog reading.

Back to the Swisssh Radio Complex…

I really have all the latest gadgets here at the gigantic Swisssh Radio complex. For instance, there is a leather chair in the control room that gently vibrates to soothe my aching back. There is a problem, however. I can’t have the microphone “live” when the chair is switched on because the mic picks up the noise of the vibrations.
Not a good thing.
A friend at another sprawling broadcast centre not far from Orillia, told me recently that he has to refrain from recording when the washing machine kicks into its major spin cycle. He says, assuredly, that some cycles are quieter allowing recording to continue but a major spin makes it quite impossible to proceed!
They can put a man on the moon but…..

I do an occasional bit of dusting around the control room now and then, being especially careful when dusting or vacuuming around wires. Believe me, there are a mess of wires twisting across the carpet beneath the control room desk- like dozens of snakes slithering back and forth. It’s like being in an Indiana Jones movie.

By the way, hate snakes- just like Indie. A cute, little, harmless, green grass snake can make me scream like a schoolgirl on cough syrup laced with codeine, when it crosses my path- even while bicycling. It’s much worse if I am walking along a path and one slithers past. I shiver and shake and squeal like that guy in the movie Deliverance.
Not quite like that, but you get the general idea.
No mental pictures here please!

I get so un-nerved, I jump into the arms of any stranger who happens to be strolling past. Sometimes, it’s quite embarrassing- even for a CCABW!

So, here I am in my little world of Net Radio and a host Website, entertaining throngs- at least 15-20, people daily!
Maybe more.
What’s in a number?

Look, I’m not complaining. Before Marconi threw a few tubes together in a box and punched some small holes in the front, radio was yelling out an upper storey window at the neighbour’s house- just to share news and gossip. It was singing- guitar in hand, at the top of your lungs, hoping that someone would hear and applaud. The audience grew larger on cold winter nights when sound travelled farther over the frozen earth.

Meanwhile, I have a nice desk. Three microphones. Three computers. A few thousand songs. A licence to broadcast those songs from SOCAN- and of course my vibrating, leather CEO chair.

Ah, it doesn’t get any finer than this…