ROBBLOG # 265

I just can’t get Paris out of my mind.

I wasn’t in France long enough to see anything more of the country than Paris- the City of Lights, however I fell in love.
Paris in the Springtime. It has always been my dream to be there in the spring when things are bursting out over.
So indulge me.

The Top 10 Things I loved about Paris…in the Spring.

1. The Outdoor Cafes. They are everywhere, spreading out along the wide sidewalks that are dotted with trees and leafy greenery. Waiters are bustling about. You’ll giggle at the laugher of the restaurant patrons, while taking in the aroma of Parisienne Cusine and hearing the tinkling of tall wine glasses.

2. Hearing the French language. Lightly rhythmic. Romantic. Wonderful. Mais Oui!

3. The cheery morning hello-

-Bonjour! Hello!

-Un café avec lait s’il vous plait.

-Petit ou grand, Monsieur.

-Grand, s’il vous plait.

-Oui, bon.

4. What I took to be young, male college students celebrating their last day of school at a magnificent cluster of old buildings near the L’arc de Triomphe, stripped to the waist in the warm Paris sunshine, turned out to be 101 shirtless male models on the loose on the Champs-Élysées to celebrate the opening of its Paris flagship store. Awww. Just for me. They called to those of us on the sidewalk below from second and third storey balconies. They shouted down to those of us below with happy voices, all the while waving their muscular arms, flexing toned pecs and flashing brilliant smiles. We waved back and smiled too!
Big Smiles! Only in Paris. The video is at:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=qjZkkJTRbDA

5. The people of Paris sunning themselves from comfortable, green lawn chairs dotted around huge, circular pools of water that were found in the spectacular gardens leading up to the Louvre just past the Place de la Concorde.

6. The traffic on the roads. Busy. Crazy. Driving every which way but loose. Actually the drivers are all “loose”! They wouldn’t be able to drive on the roads if they were tense. I know I couldn’t drive on Paris streets even if I was loose- as a goose!

7. The coffee. Café au Lait. Wonderful. Not strong like German coffee but just right with that frothy swirl of milk or creme. Yum!

8. The River Seine winding through the City. Past the Eiffel Tour, the National Assembly, The Louvre and Notre Dame. Huge barges- some permanent homes for locals others that are jam-packed with tourists taking the river tour while enjoying a wonderful dinner.

9. Crisp, white linen. The fabric of the tablecloths on café tables. White napkins folded with perfection, next to china plates that are encircled with gold. Smart-looking, white linen jackets on waiters at posh outdoor cafes- even at high noon- Paris time.

10. The architecture. Most building in Paris are no more than 4 or 5 stories tall. Many are hundreds of years old. Looking up at the buildings one sees that most apartments have small balconies encircled with wrought iron railings. The entrances to the flats are hidden behind huge, narrow doors painted in a variety of colours- each with their own distinctive doorknobs or knockers. Opening a door, it undoubtedly leads into open, airy, plant-filled courtyards that are nestled behind the shops and restaurants that face out to the street.

There might just be one more blog about Paris. Maybe I should tell you what to see in Paris in just a day. However long you have, see as much as you can. Maybe I should tell you a little more about the Louvre or the gardens or the Champs Elysees or the bicycles and motorbikes.

Maybe…

ROBBLOG# 264

If it’s Tuesday it must be Belgium.

Not exactly true. It would be better stated as-
If it’s the Weekend, it must be Paris!

If you’ve been wondering where I have gotten to- since there hasn’t been a blog in several days, I’ve been in Paris.
Yes.
Paris France, right on the Seine.

I have always wanted to be in Paris in the Springtime and now I have been.
It was a quick couple of days but well worth it.
What a beautiful city! History galore.



Walking towards the Arc de Triomphe

 I guess what amazed me the most, besides the simple fact of just being there, is seeing famous landmarks and works of art- in person. The language and signage is one thing but French is something I see- or hear, everyday right here at home- from road signs to cereal boxes.
Just walking up the street from the hotel, Tom- our friend Lisa and I passed café after café after café and then, right in front of us- there was the “Arc de Triomphe”. Awe-inspiring, as is the traffic madly going in circles before racing off down one of the half-dozen avenues- spokes, reaching out from the Arch which is rooted in the centre. I don’t think I could ever drive a vehicle in Paris. Maybe I’d ride a bicycle but walking is pretty straight forward and ultimately safer.

I had a mission in Paris. I had my heart set on going to the Louvre and visiting Mona.
The Mona Lisa.
La Gioconda.
The route up to the entrance to the Louvre passes through well-tended gardens, fountains and a pair of huge ponds that Parisians encircle in the spring sunshine tanning, chatting and reading a good book. As you come closer to the building itself you realize just how massive this place is. Then right in the middle of the courtyard a modern, glass pyramid. If you know the Tom Hank’s movie- The Da Vinci Code, you’ll know the pyramid. The exact opposite in design and scale of the Louvre but manifique
Those Parisians.
Anyway, somehow the glass pyramid works. I can’t explain it. It just does.

Once inside, we purchase tickets and head to the first floor Denon Wing. Mona is in the Salle des Etats where paintings of an Italian origin hang. I did some research before leaving home. Going to the Louvre website online, I could not only see where Mona was located but I took a virtual tour of the salon, online, to see who kept her famous person company.

After entering the main hall in the Denon wing, we looked for Salon 6. I knew just inside the door to the left we would find the largest painting in the Louvre’s collection- the massive Wedding at Canan by Paolo Veronesze. It’s the size of a large movie screen. Along the walls at either side were famous oils- from Rembrandt among others.



Mona

 Then I saw her.
Hanging all alone on a huge blank wall at the far end of the salon. I had heard she was small but seeing her in person was a bit of a shock. We could get right up close- about 10 feet or so away. Mona lives behind protective glass where the air is temperature- controlled. It doesn’t affect how you see her but when Tom took a non-flash picture, you could see a dull shine from the reflection of the glass.
I just stood and stared.
At her hands.
Her bosom.
The background.
The crack- just above her head, on the board she was painted on and of course- that infamous smile.
It was like she was hiding something.
She had a secret and wasn’t about to share.
Maybe Leonardo da Vinci told an amusing story as she posed.
Maybe he stood on his head to make her smile.
Maybe…just maybe she had eaten cauliflower the evening before and she had let out a small “puff” of ~ahem~ air.

Her eyes seemed to reach out and touch your heart.
She was beautiful and there she was sitting there right in front of us.
Mona was nowhere else in the entire world.
She was right there in front of us.
Breathtaking. Memorable.

Before we left the Louvre, we took a quick trip down a sweeping marble staircase to find the Venus de Milo. She stood- armless just like in every photo I have ever seen, naked to below her navel, perched atop a marble pillar.
She was bleached white.
She was beautiful, I must admit but she was “damaged goods”. I couldn’t help but wonder what she had looked like- with arms.
A guide nearby was telling a group of tourists- in French, that Venus was perfection of the female face- maybe even the human form.
“Eet ees Posse-bull”- he said.
I dunno.
Maybe.

Other famous paintings along with Greek and Roman sculptures too numerous to mention, lined the walls and galleries. The Louvre itself was an amazing building- once a palace for royalty, where it could quite possibly take a week to see it all- it’s that big.

Crossing the River Seine which runs alongside the Louvre, we saw it crowded with watercraft. Across the bridge was the National Assembly, home to the French Parliament. We walked along the banks of the Seine- for what seemed an eternity, to see La Tour Eiffel. It was much larger than I expected.
Overpowering really and all metal. The tower was rusty brown in colour, soaring upwards into the blue Paris sky. We sat on a bench- at the south side just under the tower’s edge, munching on Pomme Frites and sipping Café Lattes.


Tom's pic of La tour Eiffel

 Sounds very French- n’est-ce pas?
Okay. It was like a big plate of golden French fries and a coffee- with milk.
Ya just gotta love Paris!

The cafes and restaurants- looked like one big movie set filled with extras, with servers scurrying about in white jackets, black pants or skirts and long dark ties. Above the scene of culinary delights, window boxes were overflowing with geraniums from second story windows.

We had dinner at a corner café- “Le Relais de Venise”. Patrons were lined out onto the street. This restaurant was on a quaint little corner with tables both outside and inside- on two levels. We chose it for several reasons.
It was quaint. So French. So Parisienne.
The lineup- waiting for tables, stretched out into the street. That was a positive sign. It was a no smoking establishment. Museums and Charles de Gaulle airport aside, everywhere else the people of Paris smoked- poor or not. Not quite as in your face as being in Germany let’s say- but they lag far behind Canadians in regards to smoke-free air.

It took us about a half hour to get a seat but once inside we were impressed. It couldn’t have been more French.
Noisy.
Busy.
Colourful.
A variety of people.
A charming atmosphere.
Warm and welcoming servers.
The food was good but simple.
They only served one item- steak and pommes frites- French Fries-remember? A fresh salad with simple dressing to start. Basket after basket of baguette bread.
Café au lait.
Wine- a red and a white.
The steak- its doneness cooked as ordered, came covered in a sauce. The restaurant was ‘Son Entrecote”- in English “all you could eat”. The three of us did- two helpings- but with all that glorious French bread- that was it. Anyway, we wanted to save room for dessert.


Our Server Bendite & Me

 The deserts were decadent- including a plate of French vanilla ice cream piled high between two meringue bisquits that were soaking in and covered with a rich chocolate sauce. All this was topped with fresh whipped cream!
Tres decadent!

I loved Paris.
We all did.
It was absolutely stunning.
Such history.
Such colour- gold everywhere on statues, bridges, buildings and more.
It leaves you wanting more.

So…
We’ll go back. Soon.

ROBBLOG # 263

We just had to go back and take a picture of the sign. The sign that is just over the bridge in Atherley. The other evening we had a burger at the Roadside Eatery- one of our favs, just out number 12 past Rama Road and right next door to Leatherdale Marine.

On the way back into town Tom stopped the Swissshmobile and took a shot of “the sign”. That's the sign that tells us judgement day is coming May 21.
Girlfriends, in the Gay World- everyday is Judgement Day.
Wake me when it’s over.

Like the Sign Says: It’s all over on May 21st 2011.
As a public service, I thought I would a list a few things that you need to do or shouldn’t do- a “bucket list” if you will, before the Tribulation and Rapture.


1. Open the cottage for the season- albeit a short one, a week early on May 14th.

2. Sell those May 30th tickets to the Lion King to some unsuspecting heathen.

3. Make a new will that includes a bunch of greedy, no-good relatives. They’ll never get
your stuff anyway.

4. Mail your Christmas Cards- early!

5. Don’t fill the gas tank on Friday May 20th. Save your money. What for I don’t know!

6. If you’ve never robbed a bank, you might try it early in the morning on May 21st! What’s the worst that could happen- a few hours or minutes in prison.

7. Don’t buy any new summer fashions and most certainly don’t flip through a fashion magazine to see what’s new for fall. I mean really- what’s the use?

8. Tell your boss what you really think just before 5PM on Friday May 20th. There’ll be no work on the Tuesday following Victoria Day anyway.

9. Have Gay Sex with your best friend. It’s not like it’s a long-tern thing or anything…

10. Wondering what to buy the wife for her 40th Birthday in June. Do you really care?

11. Don’t pay your phone bill that's due on May 25th.

12. Spend your life savings on something frivolous- like a slot machine at the Casino.

13. Run up a huge long distance bill by calling Auntie Gerdie in Dusseldorf.

14. If you take a 24 hour allergy pill on the morning of May 21st, I have just one question- Why?

15. If you’ve never seen Niagara Falls, now would be a good time for obvious reasons!

See you in eternity.

ROBBLOG #262

Did you get the “Peace” flyer that area Muslims dropped off in our mailboxes- or like at our house- the verandah floor, over the weekend?

The cover is all about Peace. A globe with a dove-wings outstretched, winging past it. The dove’s face has a rather Arabic look about it.

Hmmm. Peace is so relative.

Is this an offering of Peace after the Americans killed Osama Bin Laden who in turned has killed hundreds- if not thousands? Is it just in case weapons of mass destruction actually cause just that- mass destruction.

Then there’s the Peace surrounding Muslims and Christians who threw stones at each other in Egypt on Sunday after Muslims set fire to two Christian Churches and a Christian Apartment block. A dozen Christians- just people really, lost their lives all in the name of religion. News reports say scores were injured.

This is Peace between Muslims and Christians not to mention Hindus and Aryas also mentioned in the pamphlet. Guess the Jews are out of this one!
All I can say is-
Shit!
Just two weeks before Jesus flies back to earth two on May 21.
Whuck?
You men you haven’t heard yet?
You need to do some research. Just read the previous column on this blog for insight on Christ’s return on The Victoria Day Weekend.
I don’t make this stuff up folks.
I just tell you about it, with a sarcastic humourous slant of course.

But people- how many times do I have to say it?
There is no God.
There is no Jesus and although I have never studied Islam, I would pretty much be safe in saying that there is no such person- living, dead or breathing in Heaven- as in Muhammad.

This brochure from a Mosque in Maple Ontario of all places says Loyalty to one’s Country is a part of Faith. Forgetting your “old” country and getting on with life in your new one is how it should be. Isn’t that why people leave the old and look forward to the new? Unfortunately, when faiths such as this come to Canada, all the hatred and bias comes along with it. Then old wars leaves the far-flung borders- many time zones away from Canada, where they become a part of the fabric of Canadian life.
I believe this is wrong.
If you leave a country to get away from the torment, why bring the very thing that started the torment in the first place to your new land.

Heaven only knows.

Now as far as the Holy Qur’an goes Islam’s message of peace and love is struck inside- somewhere, just like the Christian message of peace and love is struck in various places in the bible or maybe on those tablets Moses carried down to the sex-mongers in his tribe who got tired of waiting foe him to exeunt down the mountain.

So what in the Hell does all this mean.
I don’t really know why a Mosque in Maple Ontario would see fit to spread their “Love for All- Hatred for None” message to Conservative Orillia.

If I had of had the opportunity to talk to the young man I saw dropping the brochure on my front verandah, I would have asked two questions.

First:
“So, whaddahya think of women and how come they can’t sit next to you in your Mosque and why do they have to keep their head covered and be seen-well, hardly ever, while definitely not being heard!”

Question Number Two.
“I am a Gay man. So how are you feeling about that Love for all- Hatred for none thing right about now? As a side comment, seeing all those men in the media when they’re demonstrating or throwing stones or drinking strong coffee in little bistros that line your streets in the old country, would it be fair to say that at least a few of them would like to lock lips and more with the quiet little handsome fellah sitting in the back corner of the café reading GQ Magazine.
I’m just saying, all those handsome, dark-skinned men in one place in a hot country and well, I mean something’s got to give. Might as well be the Speedos- if you get my drift!”

I haven’t looked at the this site but if you are curious or just fantasize about a lot of dark-skinned men prancing about the desert try www.LoveForAll.ca

Finally, from the Holy Qur’an 7:57- “And create not disorder in the earth after it has been set in order”- Allah- the Gracious and the Merciful.

Sounds like a practice what you preach kind of situation.

Too bad it falls onto deaf ears and then onto the hard, dry earth below.

ROBBLOG # 261 W E E K E N D Edition

My grandmother taught me so much.

Not that she had to. It just happened naturally. I was like a sponge and soaked it all up. I loved my Grandma. She was a very classy lady. No matter where she was or what she was doing, she wore a shade of lipstick that was the colour of the raspberries like those she served for dessert, without the whipped cream, of course.

My Grandmother didn’t shove ideas into my head on purpose.In a way, it just happened. You see my parents tried to do their best with me but only Gram knew my true heart. So, I would live with her- even if it was just in my own mind.

She taught me for instance that Granddad should be seen and very rarely heard. He didn’t seem to mind that at all. He would sit in his big mission-style rocker in the glassed-in side porch and ruminate on life. Sometimes he would just sit sorting his fishing tackle. At other times he would read his newspapers with a favourite cup of tea on the table in front of him.

On sunny afternoons when her housework was done, Gram- with a tea towel slung over her left shoulder, would join Granddad on the porch. She’d ask what was new in the paper and he would tell her.


On my Grandparent's 50th Anniversary
In the Sunporch L-R Uncle Earl, Cousin Tom,
Me in Granddad's Rocker and Cousin Judy

Life was simple and Gram’s house was always warm and welcoming. I especially loved her dining room. In the centre of the room was a big mahogany dining table that would seat about 12 relatives- comfortably, both at Thanksgiving and Christmas. One of the house’s two telephones also found a home in the dining room. The second phone was a wall model in the upstairs hallway. It was new and plastic not like the Bakelite model on the telephone table in the dining room. This heavy telephone found its place on a sturdy, dark-stained, telephone table- all the rage in the 50’s, that set tight up against the wall to the right as you came in the dining room door. Grandma would have long telephone conversations seated side-saddle on the little padded chair- which was attached to the table. Underneath was a convenient shelf where the Orillia Telephone book sat- all 46 pages of it- yellow pages included!


My Grandmother- Lillian and Grandfather-Norman, on their 50th

The room where I stayed-sometimes, was upstairs to the right. A stovepipe from the wood burning oven in the kitchen ran through it and continued right up through the roof. Needless to say, no other heat source was needed in the room- thankfully. It would have been much too warm if there had of been a heating vent. Most of the year, it was like a sauna. There was enough warmth from the stovepipe in the winter and just plain heat and humidity creeping in through thinly insulated walls during the long, hot summers.

Next to the bedroom was a small three piece bath with a white sink that reminded me of one hanging on the wall under the mirror at Rocco’s Barber Shop. The sink in Grandma’s bathroom- although attached to the wall too, was also supported by two chrome pipes that ran to the floor supporting the front corners of the sink. I didn’t have far to go if nature called during the wee morning hours.

Lunch at the kitchen table was always a sandwich on brown bread with pickles and for dessert- a bowl of fruit. A glass of milk always accompanied lunch. I would take my time chewing the sandwich as many times as I could before I swallowed. Grandma was a student of the school of “chewing each piece of food 40 times”. At family meals it took forever to get through the main course. Grandma would take a forkful of food, rest her fork on her plate and chew and chew and chew. If the sit down meal began at 5:30, dessert was served at 7:30 or 8 o’clock.
It took forever for Gram to masticate.
Often dessert- and tea or coffee for the grown-ups, was served in the living room or maybe even the side porch. It would be a more casual affair than the actual main course around the mahogany table in the dining room.

I am sure I learned my penchant for nice things and long, sit down meals from my Grandmother.

She passed back in January 1965.
I miss her still.

ROBBLOG # 260

Well Good Lord! It’s always something!

First Harper gets a majority- or does he, really...
Now Jesus Christ is coming back to earth on Saturday May 21, 2011. Don’t believe me?
Just Google "Jesus May 21 2011" and you’ll see.

You can also check out the huge billboard just on the north side of the Jake Gaudaur Bridge at Atherley. Yes, the billboard is on one side of Hwy 12 while people- sinners in all probability, line up at the drive through for their Timmies.
Oh the inhumanity of it all.

So today, let me help you with a couple of things friends. First of all the Federal Election.

I did some research on the internet. You’ve seen the numbers for the various parties. You know that Duceppe is gone and Ignatieff is toast.
Burnt toast.
I feel bad for the guy. He was almost crying. Dirty bast...Never mind.
All right. If you’re a Conservative, stop wringing your hands while laughing in a low guttural tone with saliva running down the side of your chin onto the ground beneath.
Nyaaa Hahh Hahh.
We all get it.
You’re happy.
You are full of Glee.
Possibly you are full of something else but listen, just as you thought things were looking up some religious fanatic in Tennessee- are you surprised, tells us Christ is coming and the Rapture in a couple of weeks on May 21st followed by the end of the world.
There goes the weekend.
Shit. Just when you thought things were looking up- eh?


Jack Layton Leader of the Opposition


He’s what I discovered about the election.

The Conservative and New Democratic parties are be over-represented in Parliament thanks to a voting system that cheats Canadians, according to an analysis by Fair Vote Canada. This group advocates replacing the current “first-past-the-post system” with one that awards seats in numbers closer to the popular vote. They have just released figures showing the National outcome if we had this more fair, more democratic “popular” vote system here in Canada.
The results as we saw them on election day were:
Conservative: 167
NDP: 102
Liberal: 34
Bloc Quebecois: 4
Green: 1

However, using proportional representation, Prime Minister Stephen Harper would have won a minority government with these seat totals:
Conservative: 122
NDP: 95
Liberal: 59
Bloc Quebecois: 19
Green: 13

Whaaaaaat you say?
The Cons would be the last to tell you but federally they received only two percent more votes than they did in the 2008 election. However, this time they gained they gained 24 seats.
Bronwen Bruch of Fair Vote Canada says that while Stephen Harper says the totals are an endorsement of the Harper Government in reality it’s a rip off!! Harper won his majority winning 54.22 percent of the seats. He only had 39.62 percent of the votes.
Makes it sound pretty illegitimate- doesn’t it?
Brunch says it’s one of the least legitimate as far as majorities go in Canadian History.
Even Jack Layton’s NDP who has supported adopting a proportional representation system in the past is over-represented by 7 seats. So there. You can read more online. Search “The Tyee”. If you have been feeling in a bit of a “blue” funk this should make you feel better and at least support the Proportional Representation System.


Now about Jesus Christ. Maybe if you are making plans for Victoria Day Monday, you should hold off for a bit. You see Christ is coming back to earth on the Saturday of the Victoria Day weekend.
I know. I know. It’s like a houseguest announcing himself a day or so before you’re ready.
I mean you haven’t even dusted the guest room.
Oh, while you’re at it if you’re planning on seeing Billy Elliot in Toronto, better see the show before the 21st!


A Billboard like this, is on Hwy 12 at the Narrows

 Now, not only does a fellah by the name of Harold Camping and this group Family Radio fully believe that the Rapture (if you don’t know what the Rapture is Google it) is imminent, they also say this whole thing stretches out until October when the world will end- for sure.
Definitely.
Probably.
We’re pretty sure.
Likely.
We believe so.
Look, it’s true…

Now, someone told me a while ago that their particular church doesn’t believe in the “Rapture” anymore. Kind of “old news” I suppose. Hmmm. Once again. mere mortals- Christians, changing Biblical references to suit themselves.
So, I am just the messenger here.

The end of the world is nigh and for Christ’s sake don’t make any huge plans for Saturday May 21st, for the Lord will arrive in a blast of trumpets from the Heavenly Hosts and a puff of smoke- red and blue I would guess. There will be Thunder and lightening that will, well…light up the world from East to West. Look if you don’t believe me, ask your Minister or at least text the Pope.
No.
I mean the real Pope. Not Stephen Harper.

Now then Kiddies, thus endeth the lesson for today.
Aren’t you glad you came?

ROBBLOG # 259

They say you shouldn’t say anything bad about the dead.
Osama Bin Laden is dead.
Good.

Some of the first photos I saw online showed a bunch of Americans hootin’ and hollerin’ and waving signs and their flag. I thought that it pretty much the same thing Muslims do when they have murdered a westerner or stoned a woman. The apple doesn’t fall far from the heart. It’s too bad there has to be this evil on this earth- in mortal form, such as Osama Bin Laden.

I know you’ve heard me say this before but religion is to blame.
There are religious fanatics who will do anything in the name of Jesus Christ, Mohammed or whomever. Same outpouring of sprirt.
Same mis-direction.
Same translation of words written centuries ago- translated to fit their purpose.
It just all comes from a different book.

Don’t let protestants and catholics can’t get off too easily. They have also committed atrocities over the years, each in their own way. The Jews are still going at it too as they did centuries ago and of course many P’s and C’s still squarely blame the Jews for the death of a Saviour.

Speaking of a “saviour”, I would imagine the media is full of a Harperite victory as I write this on Monday afternoon for posting at midnight. There is still something massively unfair about our election process.

You know who I really wanted to vote for?
Jack Layton.
I met Layton and Olivia a couple of years ago at Toronto Pride. His arms were around Tom and I as we spoke our first few words to him. He called Olivia to his side and introduced us as we mentioned we had been married the same amount of years as they had been married.
Jack admitted that there wasn’t a strong NDP presence in Simcoe North and that he’d have to work on that point.

Well, Jack. There still isn’t. I wouldn’t now the NDP candidate if I fell over him, yet I know all the others including that “heretic” Adrian Kooger.
What a piece of work that guy is!
I have “faith” he’ll never show his face at my door in the name of the O.P.P.

I’ve said in this space before that I met Michael Ignatieff last summer. Tom and I both found him warm and sincere, possessing leadership qualities. I don’t know why that doesn’t translate on television. His sparkling blue eyes danced such a dance when we met him. I truly believe Canadians bought the disparaging characterization the Harperites were selling.
Too bad.
This thing about him working and teaching in America.
For **** sakes!
99 point 9 percent of Canadians wish they were Americans anyway, so why believe the garbage shoved at us by the Reformers in sheep’s clothing- The Harper Government, previously known as the Government of Canada.

Without Mr. Harper and his Reformer/Alliance folks on the scene. I wonder where we would we be this very day. Hell even former PM’s Clark and Mulroney have little time for “a Harper Canada.”

When I went in to the poll to mark my ‘X”, a couple of thoughts came to mind.
Firstly, how lucky we are to be able to vote and take it for granted. A simple voters card, some ID and they give you this piece of paper where you choose your favourite candidate and then pop it into the cardboard ballot box.
So simple and my right as a Canadian.

Secondly, I thought there were too many names on the ballot. Look, if memory serves me right, if that Krooger fellah, Valerie Powell and the NDP Guy all set their sights on another party, we’d have a Liberal win here in Simcoe North. More people vote for someone other than Mr. Stanton if I remember my figures from last time.

After all Krooger could join the Harper Team. My goodness they are all Christian bedfellows anyway. Both are from fringe churches of a “Baptist you’re all gonna die and burn in the fires of Hell” nature, so why not just vote for what you have already?

I have known Valerie for years but the Greens? C’mon. Really?
Although it’s a very environmentally friendly name and they reuse their signs by pasting a candidates name over the previous one, they don’t have a chance- either before the rapture or after.

Sidebar: The Rapture? Did you hear that Jesus Christ is returning to earth on May 21, 2011. That’s right, later this month. Now don’t worry. You still have a good many days to go before you have to even think about being “born again” to save your soul and head up to heaven- that’s just on the other side of the clouds where those 777’s fly, with Jesus and the Gang.


Of course the rest of us get to sit here on earth for another seven years- Christ doesn’t want to count us all out you know. Like the Liberals, he hopes there are some of us sitting on the fence about this religion thing and will eventually consent to have him hold us tightly to his breast.

Now where was I?
Oh yes and that NDP fella- what’s his name.
I don’t think so! Even though a few Jack Layton signs appeared here and there around the city. Jack would be my man if I could vote directly for him. Maybe Jack should turn the other cheek- like he did in that massage parlour, and run as a Liberal.
It’s been done before.
Yes it has!
Bob Rae ring any bells?

You know, we probably should just have let Mr. Rae be the Liberal leader after what’s his name from Quebec floundered through the last campaign.
But you now what?
I met Mr…ummm…ummmm. You know who I mean. I thought he was quite nice and amiable that Mr….ummmm.
Damn- what was his name?
Today, someone suggested that Rick Mercer should run for the Liberals.
It would be an absolute landslide- wouldn’t it?
A bit of a joke too given his personality and what he does for a living- making jokes and all- but we all could use a bit of a laugh in the House of Commons.

Anyway, it is what it is.
Osama is singing with the Muslim Angels and Harper is sitting on his throne in Ottawa and we couldn’t wipe the smirk off his “reformed” face if we tried.

The True North Strong and Free- that is until Osama’s family and friends bomb the hell out of us or Harper takes us back to a quieter, more un-enlightened time!
Have a good day fellow Canadians!