Monday, September 23, 2013


It’s all about the Drama in Life.
Rodney enters the dining room of  Portwright Manor. He finds Lady Hacknell sitting at the breakfast table. She is glancing off into space.
Rodney: Why Lady Hacknell are you feeling ill this morning?
Lady Hacknell: Oh…no My Dear.
Rodney: Are you entirely sure you are fine?
Lady Hacknell: Yes. Of Course. I was just mulling through the events of last evening in my mind.
Rodney: Well, I am glad that you are not ailing and that I find you well this morning.
Lady Hacknell: Thank you My Dear. It was a most enjoyable evening- albeit tiring.
Now do help yourself to the breakfast buffet. It’s quite delicious.
Rodney: I will Lady Hacknell. I most certainly will! I believe the guests quite enjoyed the dancing last evening.
Lady: …and the orchestra was quite delicious.
Rodney: As are these scones and the fluffy eggs. I wonder what the poor people are having for breakfast.
They laugh with glee
Penelope enters the breakfast room in high spirits. She is wearing a rose petal pink morning dress. Her hair is tied in a bow
Penelope: Morning! Isn’t it a beautiful morning…and I am sure the day will be absolutely charming as well. Don’t you just believe it will?
Lady Hacknell: Well, someone appears to be in rather high spirits after dancing the night away,
Rodney: I’ll say. A cup of coffee Penelope?
Penelope: Why yes Rodney. That would be lovely. Looking out the French doors towards the garden Oh isn’t it wonderful? The view I mean.
Rodney: Yes, indeed. He passes her a cup of coffee I was just saying to Lady Hacknell- as you so gaily pranced in here, that guests really quite enjoyed the dancing last evening.
Penelope: Oh I am quite sure they did!
Rodney: It is certainly going to be remembered as one of the highlights of this season. Do you think as much Lady Hacknell?
Lady: Why yes…I suppose I do. To Penelope Breakfast is on the sideboard Dear.
Rodney: Oh yes Pen, the eggs are an absolute out of body experience.
Penelope: Then, I shall try the eggs based on your suggestion and recommendation Dear Rodney.
Lady: So Penelope, your little walk in the garden last night with that handsome Derrik Tomlinson was enjoyable?
Penelope: Why Lady Hacknell, whatever do you mean?
Rodney: Come, come now Pen, both Lady Hacknell and myself saw you float through the garden doors with that brute of a man. Was he all you hoped he would be?
Pen: Oh yes!
Lady: We saw you laugh and drink champagne for an hour at least.
Rodney: Rather!
Pen: Yes and after the champagne he took those huge, strong, hairy hands of his and shoved them up underneath my gown. It was quite titillating!
Rodney: Oh so he went for those too did he?
Lady: Rodney! Really. I am trying to partake of my toast and marmalade!
Rodney: Sorry Lady H.
Pen: Yes, I fear I shall quite never be the same ever again.
Lady: No Dear. I suppose you never will. You young people. You have to go all the way don’t you? All that touching and feeling and grabbing. Getting all hot and bothered. Whatever is wrong with a simple and sweet peck on the cheek of one’s admirer?
Pen: Oh Lady Hacknell. You do make me laugh. After breakfast I shall ride out into the fields and tell every chipmunk and robin I see what you have just said. I shall speak it to the wind.
Rodney: Maybe I’ll ride with you Pen. I feel the need of something stiff against my face this morning too. Uh…a stiff wind I mean.
Lady: Lady Hacknell laughs Come now Rodney. I may be older in years than I once was but I still catch your drift. It’s more than a stiff wind you desire to be brushed across your charming face.
Pen: Is that so Rod?
Rodney: Well…I…perhaps. Flustered  Why don’t I just meet you in a half hour in the stable.
Lady: Have a lovely day Rodney Dear!
Pen: Catch you in a few moments. Lance is out in the stables this morning. I’m sure he’ll mount you!
Rodney: Yes. Thank you for that turn of phrase Pen.
Pen: These eggs are wonderful!
Lady: Yes they are at that!
Lady H and Pen titter between themselves as Rodney leaves the breakfast room